How to Survive the Hellidays
By Megan Dority — / Lifestyle
Some call it the Holidays, we call it the Hellidays
The holidays are rapidly approaching and what could possibly go wrong? You know it’s the jolliest time of the year once the Halloween candy goes on sale, Mariah Carey’s Christmas carols are blasting off, and it’s no longer pumpkin spice latte season. Welcome to the hellidays.
What Exactly are the Hellidays?
It’s just like the holidays but with a side of exhaustion, stress, family drama and explaining to your aunt for the thousandth time why you’re still single. Not to worry, we’ve got a few tips to get you through the most chaotic season of all. And better yet, we’ve got a festive, new blend coming just in the (Saint) Nick of time.
Tips for the Host:
Ballin’ on a budget? The holidays can certainly wreak havoc on your bank account, especially if you’re hosting. With gifts to buy, holiday cards to mail, decorations, plus food and drinks to stock up on—it can quickly burn a hole in that pocket of yours. Before you blow those big bills, try to find ways to save.
Think outside the box by making homemade gifts, shop early so can you get your gifts by Christmas and save some money by shopping on Black Friday and Cyber Monday. (Pro tip: We have some pretty sick deals and giveaways going down that weekend, so stay tuned.)
Prep the food early. Does the thought of cooking a full-blown roast dinner or the Feast of the Seven Fishes have you in a cold sweat? You certainly aren’t alone. Be sure to do your grocery shopping early and plan ahead with Grandma’s Gingerbread Recipe.
If you have guests coming over, suggest having a potluck dinner—that way everyone can contribute. Otherwise, put those elves to work in the kitchen and divide, conquer and devour that meal. Let’s be real, no one will ever know you served frozen hors d’oeuvres when all is said and done.
Up your drink game. Want to make up for the frozen pigs in a blanket or store-bought cookies? Blow your guests away with your holiday cocktails. It can be as simple as dressing up a classic cocktail with a fancy garnish or throwing a kick of caffeine in there. We’ve got plenty of coffee cocktails up our Reaper sleeve. And, you can be the first to shake them up with our festive new coffee blend. Just make sure Uncle Bob doesn’t have one too many.
Deck the halls. It seems like every year the holiday decorations are busted out earlier and earlier. People go from tossing their pumpkins to throwing up the holiday lights, just like Martha May Whovier. We might hate those people, but we have to admit, they’re on to something. The faster you throw up those decorations, the more time you have to prep for the big helliday gathering. Drink coffee, decorate and drink more coffee.
Tips for the Guest:
Don’t be rude, bring food. Want to earn some brownie points with your future mother-in-law? Offer to pitch in—even if that means bringing a sad, soggy salad to the occasion. It’s the thought that counts, right? If you really want to wow the host, may we suggest our Gingerdead Coffee?
If you want to save a buck or two on wrapping paper, our coffee bags can be recycled into the most badass wrapping paper or holiday tinsel you’ve ever seen. And, if you want a one-stop shop for all your helliday needs, stop by our retail shop for all things coffee, exclusive mugs and limited-edition merch.
Pick your battles. To help keep the peace on ‘O Holy Night, try your best to steer clear of risky conversation topics. If you know Uncle Bob turns into a political expert after a few Death Wish Espresso Martinis, and insists on knowledge dumping all over Christmas dinner (and Facebook), take a deep breath and think before you speak. You don’t want your friendly discussion to end up turning into a blood bath and beyond.
Manners go a long way. Even if you hate your in-laws' family traditions of the oven mitt contest, the gingerbread house competition, Christmas caroling or the annual fugly sweater contest—remember to always play nice. Good manners go a long way—even if it’s the twentieth time you’ve watched Elf in one week.
Choosing the perfect gift. Get your shopping done early, keep your eyes out for deals (hello, Black Friday + Cyber Monday) and pick a theme and go with it. Our retail shop and our website are both one-stop shops for a successful helliday season. We recommend rewarding yourself too. After all, you’ve worked hard this helliday season. Treat yourself to our coffee subscription. That's what we call the gift that keeps on giving.
If you really want to knock their stockings off this year, don't miss out on our new festive blend available just in time for the hellidays. It’s our very first time brewing up this seasonal flavor. Like a fiery kick to the tastebuds and a cozy hug from the Grim Reaper, this sweetly spiced blend is sure to warm any cold, dead heart this holiday.
Tips from the Grim Reaper:
- Tell everyone you’re going out of town.
- Hide your scale and only wear baggy clothes.
- Forgo the gift wrap and holiday cards because you’re being green.
- Spike your coffee.
- Warm your cold, dead heart with Gingerdead Coffee.
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