Here are the best ways to describe Valhalla Java and Death Wish

What's the difference between Valhalla Java and Death Wish Coffee? 

We posed one of the most important questions of our time on our social media pages—what is the difference between Valhalla Java and Death Wish Coffee? Our community did not disappoint. 

Mike Brown, founder of Death Wish Coffee Company, previously said both of them will give you a serious kick in the ass—but that's where the similarities end. Death Wish Coffee uses just the right combination of beans and the perfect roasting process to create a bold, smooth brew that will give you an extra kick of caffeine, despite being a dark roast. 

Valhalla Java, on the other hand, is a medium-dark three-roast blend, originating from the volcanic soils of Indonesia and nutrient-rich soils of Central and South America. But enough with the technical definitions—let's get into how our community described each of them on Facebook and Twitter. 

"Death Wish is how you start the day. Valhalla is what keeps you from murdering coworkers throughout the day..." —Matthew W. 

Simply put, we really couldn't agree more with this one. Coworkers should really just know not to talk to you before you've had AT LEAST one cup of coffee. Who tries to small talk before 8 a.m.? It's Monday, Brenda. 

"Valhalla Java is the nectar of the gods. Regular Death Wish turns mere mortals into Gods. It's all about where you're at and where you wanna go." —Mike Havoc

Remember in "Hercules" when he dives after Meg into that pool of death, emerges as a god and punches Hades in the face? Yeah, that's what drinking Death Wish is like. Drinking Valhalla Java is what Zeus does on the reg.

"Valhalla is a paradise of flavor. Death Wish is fuel before battle, while the Valhalla is the sweet victory drink after battle." —John A. 

Drink Death Wish before your yearly review with your boss. Drink Valhalla Java after when your boss says you get a well-deserved raise. 

"Death Wish is morning Coffee. Valhalla is night-time coffee. It's smoother and a little more laid back than Death Wish." —Amie C. 

Valhalla Java is the night cap you never knew you needed. Make it a coffee cocktail and you'll really be laid back.

Sometimes we need a good kick in the ass to get us ready for the day—it just depends on how much of a kick you need to actually get out of bed. 

Yeah, we don't recommend throwing a battle axe—unless it's metaphorically, of course. No matter what you need to get done for the day, both Death Wish and Valhalla Java will help get you there. 

Related: What's the difference between Valhalla Java and Death Wish Coffee?

WATCH THIS VIDEO: