If at first you don't succeed, then you clearly didn't drink enough coffee

Coffee is a high-five to your mouth.

My doctor says I drink too much coffee so I don't drink it anymore. But I don't drink it any less, either.

All you need is love. And Coffee.

Professional Pothead

If you are reading this you owe me a coffee.

You wanna hear a weak joke? Decaf.

My favorite co-worker is the coffee machine

Have an adequate day. Anything else would be excessive.

Coffee spelled backwards is eeffoc. As in, I don't give an eeffoc until I've had my coffee.

All you need is love. And Coffee

The only substitute for a good cup of coffee is two good cups of coffee.

You miss 100% of the coffees you don't drink

No one looks back and remembers all the nights they got plenty of sleep

Your mom drinks decaf.

Have an adequate day. Anything else would be excessive.

I've stopped drinking coffee for good. Starting now, I only drink coffee for evil

Coffee is the Black Sabbath of beverages

I need a coffee, a tattoo, and a vacation.

Without coffee, I wouldn't be the perky foul-mouthed person I am today.

Wait, I thought a balanced diet was holding a coffee in each hand

I love having coffee with my friends. And by friends I mean coffee. Coffee is my friend.

Coffee comes from a plant which technically means I've had four salads today.

You can't buy happiness but you can buy coffee and donuts and that's pretty much the same thing.

How many cups do I drink a day? All of them.

It’s ok if you don’t like coffee, not everyone has good taste.

I'm done drinking coffee for good. Starting now I only drink coffee for evil.

If you are reading this, you owe me a coffee.

People yell at me for my attitude but they haven't even seen me without coffee

I only drink coffee as black as my soul

Coffee is the Black Sabbath of beverages.

I could never be Batman, but with enough coffee, I come pretty f#&*ing close.

I'm much more of a morning person in the afternoon.

Let's get baked!...goods and coffee

I've seen enough scary movies to know htat the one who drinks coffee will probably make it out alive.

When I die, bury me in coffee beans

I only drink coffee Monday through Friday and on the weekends.

Coffee is like a punch in the face but from an angel

Let's get baked!...goods and coffee

94% of people drink coffee and the remaining 6% cry a lot.

All you need is love. And coffee. Lots of coffee.

Coffee is like a punch in the face but from an angel

I'm much more of a morning person in the afternoon

Ashes to ashes, dust to dust. Life's a b*!%# and coffee's a must

"This will fix everything" - Me, everytime I drink coffee

Before coffee: Dead inside. After coffee: dead inside, but alert.

You miss 100% of the coffee's you don't drink

Due to unfortunate circumstances, I'm awake

First I coffee, then I adult. Well, adult-ish.

I like me coffee like I like my nights: dark, endless, and impossible to sleep through

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Decaf is gross. That's why I don't drink it.

I like big cups and I cannot lie

If this morning had a face, I'd punch it

How many cups do I drink a day? All of them.

You can come out now. I've had my coffee.

First I coffee, then I adult. Well, adult-ish.

I only need coffee on days ending in "Y".

Okay, okay. I've had my coffee, you can bother me now

I stopped drinking coffee for good. As of now, I only drink coffee for evil.

Good morning to everyone except those who prefer tea over coffee.

You wanna hear a weak joke? Decaf.

Due to unfortunate circumstances, I'm awake

I love having coffee with my friends. And by friends I mean coffee. Coffee is my friend.

Uillium is my name and coffee is my game.

If this morning had a face I'd punch it.

The dinosaurs didn't drink coffee and we all know how that turned out.

Wait, I thought a balanced diet was holding a coffee in each hand.

Without coffee, I wouldn't be the perky foul-mouthed person I am today.

Coffee is the Black Sabbath of beverages.